(Onionesque:) IPhone Owner's Date Just Asks the Bartender What Song is Playing.

ZURICH-In a sparsly crowded tapas bar this weekend, an IPhone owner's date asked the bartender if he would mind telling her the name of a song playing over the sound system in the establishment. The bartender, Simon Rousseau, of ElSol Restaurant and Bar in Zurich, Enge said that he was approached about the song between orders on Friday after 10 pm.

"She asked if I knew the name of the song playing over our speakers, and I told her I did because it was from a mix CD I made myself." Rousseau stated. "I didn't mind telling her. It was Close Yet So Far by Bullet, with Armando Teixeira as Vladimir Orlov. She was kind of cute, but she isn't my type. That wasn't why I did it. I was just being nice, you know?"

The IPhone owner himself, Heinrik Dansk, expressed surprise and wonderment at the delay of his IPhone's song indentification feature in identifying the song in question. "When she wondered out loud what the song was called, I had the IPhone right there on our table, so I immediately touched the screen, accessing that feature. Before I had the information she was walking away from the table and towards the bar. She talked to that bartender with the tattoos for a (really) long time. It wasn't that loud in the bar so I don't know why it took so long. I would have had it if she had waited like, 10 seconds."

The date herself, identified only as Irma, said she would do it again given similar conditions. "It was just sort of spontaneous and friendly. A lot of what that cute bartender told me flew right over my head, but I got the song title, and that was what I was after. I might talk to him again though and find out what the hell all that other stuff he said was. I am not sure what the big deal is."

It may prove to be a big deal indeed as the public's blatant disregard for the phone's integral features could have an effect on IPhone sells this year, and ultimately on Apple corporation's bottom line in this struggling economy.